"What if by the age of 41 you're still out there dating?"- A friend I was talking to on the phone.
My response to the statement above was an alarming NO!!!! In my mind and in my dreams I hope and I pray that I'm not still single at 41-years-old. I know that in reality it is a possibility for me that I could very well be single at 41, but I don't want to live in reality on that one.
I began to think about the Period of Transition and the Period of Stability. Literally I came up with age ranges for both periods and I even came up with what I thought should be happening in those periods.
The Period of Transition begins at age 18 and in my mind should end around age 30. In this period you are working on creating a career, establishing independence, and going through the tumultuous journey of dating, partying, break-ups, and the fear of giving your heart away to someone.
The Period of Stability begins around age 31 and ends around 41. In this period you have either found or married your companion, you are married or preparing to get married, having guilt free sex within your marriage (hopefully), and you have built a home and career for yourself. This period could be boring for some if they make it that way, but I'm hoping to enjoy this with someone special and have lots of fun.
After hearing myself say this out loud to someone else I began to wonder if this was healthy thinking or not. I mean I know there are plenty of happy single 41-year-old's out there, but do I want to be apart of their merriment? Am I wrong for not wanting to be single at 41? Should you spend time planning your life like this?
Look I don't have all the answers for this, but I know that at 41 I hope I'm not still dating. Dating/relationships/starting over isn't as fun as it was when I was younger. And women don't respond well to do you like me check yes, no, or maybe boxes anymore. (DANG there goes my game).
The Period
Joseph is a Licensed Graduate Social Worker in the Washington, DC area. Joseph is the author of the forthcoming book “Love Me Right or Not at All”, A Quick Guide to Loving Yourself and Others the Healthy Way. This book seeks to assist everyone who reads it to love with balance and give love to the right people. Joseph is striving to become an expert in the practice of relationship empowerment. He strives to build healthy, powerful, and well-balanced relationships in the lives of everyone who seeks after the knowledge, values, and skills Joseph has honed over the last ten years. Joseph is an aspiring Marriage and Family Therapist, but to also travel around the nation and hopefully the world, to spread the message that relationships can be simple, yet amazing if you put in the work. Relationships are vital to the human experience and often shape our mindsets, our personalities, and our environments. Knowing this, Joseph works to encourage not only those who believe in his skills, but also works passionately to build his knowledge and skills in the area of relationships to present the best of who he is both personally and professionally.
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