A Word for the Singles

6But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. 7For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. 9But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

The truth of the matter is that people are afraid of the word SINGLE!!! Is it so bad to be single; most times no and sometimes yes. Is the desire to be married wrong; the short answer is no, but the problem comes when you’re obsessed with getting married and then you try to do whatever it takes to get to that point. It is probably better for you to stay single until you learn to put your trust in God.

Let’s talk about this scripture where some people have (in my opinion) used this to stamp the belief that some are meant to be married while others are meant to be single. In verse seven Paul was stating a “wish” or a “desire” that everyone would choose to be single. Does this mean that it was God’s will for him to be unmarried; I don’t know, but I do believe that God gave him the “gift” of singleness and gave him a purpose in his singleness. (Keywords: Gift, Purpose). Paul also made a decision to remain single and stated that he was able to focus on God’s work and what a great work it was. Paul was able to spread the Gospel and write a good portion of the Bible!!! (Don’t tell me Singles can’t do a mighty work for God). Paul also in the same breath stated in the same voice that “EVERY” man has his proper gift from God. The gift to remain single was in Paul and God gave him that gift, but Paul chose it! Paul knew God’s purpose for him was to serve and to be an apostle; only after he had and “ENCOUNTER” with Christ. How can we know God’s purpose for our lives if we don’t have an ENCOUNTER with his Son?

Paul wanted everyone to have an easier Christian walk and didn’t want people to be so divided in this Single VS Married war. He knew that there would be stigma associated with people of a certain age still being single. I believe Paul understood people would become obsessed with being married, that people would get married only to be free to have sex, that marriage would be dishonored and the people would lose focus; therefore he desired that ALL men would desire to live as he does (Celibate, Gifted, and Working in his Singleness). While this scripture clearly defines Paul’s desire for people to be “content in whatever state they are in,” it however does not support that it is God’s will or design for some to be married and some to be single.

Paul said in verse eight that if you can’t contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. So does that mean that we must marry to get rid of this lust or passion; no, but it does mean that if you’re unable to get past you’re desire to be married, and you don’t have the gifting for celibacy, at God’s appointed time; you should marry.

Please believe me when I say that lust, desire, and sin doesn’t erase when you get married, it is even a greater time for you to begin to pray for God’s mercy and protection. We must learn to do what Paul said in Philippians 4:11-13 (New King James Version), 11 Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: 12 I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. 13 I can do all things through Christ[a] who strengthens me.

If you desire to be married seek God, and if it is your desire to remain single seek God. “Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart,” Psalm 37:4

P.S.- As for me I don’t have the gift of singleness; this is prayerfully just my season and not my appointment 

jwriter
joe4christ.blogspot.com

What makes a great relationship? What are the ingredients to an amazing, exciting, spicy, thrilling, laidback, and stimulating relationship?

Earlier today I saw a man and woman arguing about his woman cheating on him and the brother looked hurt. (I was all in their business) but fellas why do u take someone else's woman and ladies why do u take another woman's man??? Let's Talk for real!!!!

Hey Ladies are good men just an option for you when you get older? Is that fair? And what makes a man good?

Marriage Talks- The Number One Reason For Divorce

The number one cause of divorce is financial issues, followed by communication issues, lack of commitment to the marriage, sexual problems, and change in priorities. Why are finances so huge that they could destroy something so sacred and so powerful than marriage?

There are three things that I will try to pinpoint as the reason why financial issues can lead to a complete breakdown in the marriage:

1. A fear of being without and a lack of trust between the married couples.
2. A lack of communication that has already existed in the marriage.
3. A fear or loss of independence and inability to foster independence while still being married.

At the top of the issue of finances is that the world has made money the standard for living; you aren’t living unless you are rich. There is just a clouded perception that money buys you happiness. It is very true that you do need money to survive, but you can’t believe that money will be the cure all to your problems. As I said a fear of being without is what spurns a lot of the initial breakdown of the relationship. It is a very scary feeling that you won’t be able to pay your bills and you are unable to trust that your spouse will be able to get you through this or support you through the hard times.

The arguments are here now and at an increasing rate. The marriage is further broken down when communication is also already a problem in the marriage. If you were already unable to communicate in the marriage, then having these financial problems will just exacerbate the communication issues. It is difficult to communicate when you don’t know you will have a roof over your head or money in the bank. It further alienates you from your spouse and the arguments move from finding a solution to providing the blame.

Finally is the part that a lot of people forget to cultivate when they get into a relationship or a marriage and that is holding on to some form of their independence. I do understand that you can’t be selfish; especially in a marriage, but you can’t become so symbiotic with the other person; that you’re unable to know who you are.

The solution, well there is so much that I can say about that, but I definitely suggestion that the couple work at the most important principles of the marriage: trust and communication. You have to be able to communicate; not argue or blame, but to talk openly about your fears, frustrations, and faith/or lack thereof. I also believe that you have to have a plan, a plan of action, and a plan to still have love for one another in the midst of this struggle. (YOU HAVE TO HAVE GOD IN YOUR MARRIAGE). I’m a firm believer in a “joint account”, but I definitely agree with Steve Harvey when he said have your joint account, but your own personal account as well (THAT YOU BOTH KNOW ABOUT).

jwriter
joe4christ.blogspot.com

Is it true what they say, "what you won't do someone else will?" I believe that, once again this statement is another excuse for people to step out on the relationship when things get rocky. On the other side of the coin though, it is very true that there is someone who is willing to communicate better than you do with your spouse, who will spend that quality time with your man or your woman than you won't, hold them through the night, someone who will build them up if you won't, care for them when you won't, love them if you won't, compliment them when you won't, freakier than you, and do all the things you won't do!!!! So maybe you should really think about that before you lose them to the one that will.

jwriter
joe4christ.blogspot.com

Read and then comment on what the ladies had to say about Women vs Men and who loves Harder!!!

piecesbeauty:I feel its this. Men can love harder than a woman depending on what type of man he is. Sometimes men love harder than there woman but doesn't show it because of their own insecurities within themselves. Women love hard because that is in us, its the nurturing part of who we are. Some show it in different ways but when it comes down to it that's what we do. I feel men love harder through actions and women love harder through emotions.

blessedbythebest: i think individuals love differently, regardless of their sex. i agree with @chalisse23 that it depends on what type of person they are. Yes, women, in general, are nurturing and love hard but not all women are like that. Some of them have different perspectives because of what they've seen others do or because of their own experiences . The way they act, feel and think are shaped by those experiences. Some can be more guarded and may be unable to really let themselves fall in love or love hard. Same with men. I've met some men that fall deep in love so fast and some that could care less. Some love just as hard but don't know how to express it. So my answer to the question in not necessarily.

Sorry guys - chalisse23 didn't follow the rules and share her comments with everyone. LOL

how are you going to put me out there...well here was my comments ms. big mouth.

piscesqueen: feel its this. Men can love harder than a woman depending on what type of man he is. Sometimes men love harder than there woman but doesn't show it because of their own insecurities within themselves. Women love hard because that is in us, its the nurturing part of who we are. Some show it in different ways but when it comes down to it that's what we do. I feel men love harder through actions and women love harder through emotions.

jwriter:@everyone: Thank you blessedbythebest and piscesqueen for commenting so far. I'm really excited about the comments and posting it. As you know posting is on Monday, so feel free to comment until Sunday. I'm looking forward to reading the other comments and I promise I will only do this once every two to three months so you won't miss out on too much work blessedbythebest. Oh and Men love harder then women, we just love differently, but it is terrible when a man's heart gets broken, because we don't know what to do with the broken pieces, but to lash out, or to blog LOL.

blessedbythebest: that's my point @jwriter, it is terrible when a man's heart gets broken but it's terrible when a woman's heart get broken too. I'm liable to lash out at every unsuspecting person in my path. but I know some people who will go out and party like its 1999 after a heartbreak. it just depends on the individual :)

piscesqueen: Well I have done both....The hangover was not much appreciated for the partying part but it felt better to do that than deal with the pain. Now instead of lashing out a lot of females including myself go into a bubble and just deal with it. However, is there any positive way to deal with a heart break. I mean really?

Justme: I take it that when you say 'love hard' you are referring to total commitment and loving with your whole heart? I agree with blessedbythebest men and women love hard but they express it differently. The expression of that love will depend on what they observed as a love while growing up, their past experiences, who they are as a person (i.e. self esteem) and their comfort with expressing their emotions.

Loveyourselffirst: Ok I have to agree with a lot of the comments that was made and can definitely agree the both women and men love differently. However, I do think in most cases women do love the hardest. There some men that are more sensitive then others and make their love know to the women in what ever why is needed. Then you have those guys that they feel if they take out the trash that's there way of showing how they love you. You have to ensure that the women and the man understand each other and what symbolizes their love. And to heart breaks I believe that women have is the worst and take it the worst because women are usually more emotionally attached to their partner so when the break up happens we don't know what to do with those emotions. Men on the other hand move on rather quickly to the next women in line. Women have to wait and find the next good thing and the ration of good men isn't that great these days. I have so much to say but can't type fast enough, but last statement on men loving harder I always say the best way a man show a women how much the love and appreciate her is by cheating on here. Men are a totally different animal from women. There is no science to it at all...

jwriter:@Loveyourselffirst: I first want to thank you for commenting, but I definitely have to debate that men move on a lot faster; so untrue; I think for all men that when we truly fall in love with someone, we have dropped all pretense of pride, and in a sense have made ourselves vulnerable. You are absolutely right when you say that women and men have to understand each other; MEN AND HEARTBREAK do not go together!!! It is way worst, because now a man's pride/ego/emotions/feelings everything have been stepped on and they now have to either bottle it up or be stigmatized as sensitive or weak, or they turn their hurt into anger and go on a rampage of loose women, "moving on fast- (please believe he is still thinking of you while he's banging her," or become very bitter or even misogynistic towards women. This is the cycle that has ran the ration of "good men" dry. I do believe we have to learn how to communicate better, I do believe heartbreak is hard for both a man and woman, but I think it is a lot worst for a man. (Chalk it up to the double standards of the world: Women are to be emotional (not all women are emotional or able to express emotion) and Men are to be these walls of steel, can't "fall in love", emotionless, sex addicted love sticks. (So not true at all).

lifechangingchick: WOW!!! Great points and perspectives everyone! I have to agree with blessedbythebest and picesqueen. Individuals do love differently. I believe it first has to do with upbringing as justme pointed out. What a person sees in his or her surroundings as a child may really affect how they act in a relationship. I always saw my mother and father together, doing family things, dating etc., so in every relationship I put waaaayyyy too much into it waaayyy too early thinking that was how it was supposed to be and as a result always ended up hurt. I do think that the past really affects the way a man or woman loves in the present. That may or may not be a good thing. If they take the good and the bad, learn what works and move forward it's great but of course it doesn't always work like that. I've seen and heard of many situations where both men and women allow their past to ruin a perfectly good relationship. @jwriter and actually everyone else, check out this movie called "Diary of a Tired Black Man" it really speaks to what this discussion is about and much more.

Angelthoughts: I think this question really depends on the people in the relationship. I think women are "traditionally" labeled to love harder. We are emotional, sensitive, can be needy, and we want attention from the man we love. We are nurturers so it can be in us to take care of the man and cater to the man, almost like taking care of our children. So, sure, we can love harder in the relationship. But there are men that love harder as well. Being a woman, and receiving this kind of love from a man can actually be a little scary and shocking, especially if we have had bad experiences in relationships. I've seen men that love hard, and the women takes advantage of it. Our love for each other doesn't have to be a competition, we can both give 100%.

So I got the fellas to discuss if a man should be allowed to cheat. Check out this conversation.

kdiesel: That's a good question, my answer would have to be yes and no, The reason for the "yes" is because if they are not married then you are still single. I know there should be a sense of commitment and trust but until you're married, you're still single (free). Now I'm not saying go out there and sleep with the world or even be on a rampage hurting women. If you really want to be with her then just be with her but if you still want to play them go play and let her know. I also said "no" because if you're married then you have one wife and that's it. You made a covenant unto the Lord.

Prince2D: Before I answer this question,I would like to propose a rhetorical question for thought........
"If you were given permission to cheat (HAVE SEX WITH WHOMEVER YOU CHOOSE TOO HAVE IT WITH) what is or would be the first thing YOU would do?"
Whatever your answer is, take that and say half of the world would do what you said and half the world would do the total opposite. So I say all that to say "A man with permission to cheat is a receipt for a dying world". It's equivalent to sharing a drug needle, or randomly sleeping with people knowing you have HIV. I make sound that bad because in so many instances it is really just that bad. For a woman to give her man permission to cheat, open the doors for so many hazardous arenas....let alone its totally goes against Godly teaching!!!
Giving a man/woman permission to Cheat is a modern day Sodom and Gomorrah rules....and we know how that ends. It was one point where Cheating was look down upon and people were really trying to stop because the hurt that it cause so many people and families. Even back in the day when Woman knew there husbands were cheating, they didn't give them permission but they also couldn't stop it or leave either but Now everything is coming back to full circle worst and harder then before. Cheating with Permission its an excuse for men and women to "Go Along to get along", or to "compromise what they cannot prevent or stop" and at the end everyone has been blinded to believe that this is actually working.

Sideshow: Wow, what a question, indeed the flesh jumps for joy if your mate said that you can cheat, but then you begin to wonder, if I'm sleeping around then she must be sleeping around also, and I just can't handle the fact that my boo is being tossed up like I'm tossing another shawty up...so to speak. I don't think that I'll be able to handle it on my end if the tables were turned, so my answer would be thanks, but no thanks. Not to mention we both have a past and you know what they say, when you sleep with your mate, you are sleeping with everybody that they haave slept with also....ewwwwwwww, that's one to grow on!!!!!!


Sideshow: @kdiesel & @Prince2d: You both make sense, but I'm quite sure that when a man first hears that he can go soil his royal oats, don't think that GOD comes to mind, only after he has done his do, then he begins to have a revelation.

Prince2D: @ Kdiesel: I see your point and no it wasn't establish as to who the rules apply to and honestly this question can be answered very differently depending who's answering and from there point of veiw...but lets think about this - whether your married, single and dating or both.......no one should be out there just having the time of there life with any and every woman... yes if your single you can date, interview, meet. court whatever...but if your in a relationship and your mate says "Sure you can date other woman" or however she puts it..... (and I speaking solely on the physical piece) because in my mind if your woman give you permission to CHEAT, you or any other man is not going out there with the intentions start any "emotional" tides with another woman...your going to go out there and "handle your business" with another woman and the emotional tides with come soon after "It may come". Yes cheating is more then having Sex but in this case unless specified differently...I'm almost 99.9% sure that when they say "Cheat with permission" they mean "your free to have sex with whoever you want". And about that whole Sodom and Gomorrah piece ( I speak about that in regards to those that know whats right and wrong and continue to do what they please) - and is that case it really is similar because to go out and have your way with other women knowing you you have your one at home is a sign that you clearly don't care about the will of God and don't plan on obeying either.

jwriter: @everyone: Man thank you guys so very much for your comments so far. I'm absolutely amazed at the dialogue and the content of your responses. I'm very impressed at the level of discussion we are able to have. Now as far as my answer, I think that it is important that we understand cheating is never right in any circumstances. If you want to have more than one woman to tap, have sex with, smash, crush, break headboards with; you need not to get into a relationship with anyone. Hands down!!! No questions asked, whether single and especially married. We have to look at the world we live in though. We live in a world where it is OK for married couples to swing, and for singles to have the time of their lives...(I wish I was one of those singles LOL j/k), but really we are sowing into a world full of hurt, destruction, and false doctrines when it comes to relationships. That is why a woman would be stupid enough to give her man permission to cheat, because she is tired of being hurt, lied to, and cheated on. She wants to be in control of the cheating so to speak and still be able to have someone to hold her at night. Again thank you intelligent brothers for commenting and we have until Saturday, before the forum closes. Thanks!!!!

Kdiesel: @everyone: So is it consider cheating when a men have more then one wife? As we know that still exist. I guess that can be an example of a woman giving her man permission to cheat.

jwriter: @Kdiesel: man Kdiesel I was once on a quest to find one wife, how in the world would I be able to handle more than one. I'm not even talking about the physical aspect of the marriage, but the emotional, the arguments, the financial, the horror man the horror LOL! I think that plural marriage is a whole other discussion, but one that definitely needs to be discussed. I think it is just a beautiful way to cheat in a sense, "Let's get married to each other and I can have five wives, under the principles of marriage, and repoplulate the earth. it's not cheating or perverted; it's how the world should be." I'm sorry to say, but swinging, plural marriage, open marriages, and marriage to animals (WOW) are all forms of cheating; but it does make for a great conversation. Can you imagine how that conversation would go? LOL.

Kdiesel: @jwriter: LOL. That will be a discussion that will be very interesting. One that I always wonder about.

dboy87 @ kdiesel: Man I think its just crazy. How would a man be able to pull it off staying committed to not just one but five women. He prolly got alot of money too if he has to pay five mortgages lol I personally think it is cheating, and feel bad for the women if they don't know that is doing it.

So after reading what the Men had to say; what do you guys think?

Sex, Love, and Lust: Same or Different???

Are these three forces one and the same? Can you have love and sex without lust? Can you truly have great sex without love or lust in the equation? Which one of these emotions/actions/statements are the most powerful, the most needed, the most expected? Are they the same or entirely different?

The obvious answer would be no right? That Sex, Love, and Lust are three totally different words and come with their own unique characteristics, paradigms, ups, downs, and requirements. I think that in the hands of mortals they are quite dangerous and potentially destructive. In the hands of a vampire; well they may be mastered. (That was for all my fellow TruBlood/Twilight fans: June 13 and June 30). http://www.hbo.com/trueblood

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File%3ANewmoon_cullens.jpg?powerset

But with all seriousness, can we have an amazing romantic relationship with all or none of these emotions? Can a romantic relationship exist without love; without sex; without lust? Can you separate these three from one another or must we learn the appropriate measure to use each of these within our intimate relationships?

You be the judge…

jwriter
joe4christ.blogspot.com

Lust of the Eyes

I got to get in control of my eyes. I mean I see a beautiful woman and I get stare crazy! My mother taught me a long time ago that it is rude to stare, but she didn’t warn me that my eyes would become stuck like glue on the walk, the eyes, the shape, the dance and shake; of all women; regardless of size, color, or race. I’m not like a dog on the hunt; I just like window shopping, but sometimes I see a beauty and a jolt of electricity shoots through me like I was struck by lightning on the fourth of July. Please don’t let her smile and then it’s a beautiful smile; it’s like a knee-jerk reaction and I flash that amazing smile back at her, hoping that she can catch a glimpse of her beauty in the ray of my smile, but secretly hoping she is smiling because she finds me attractive too and not that nervous uncomfortable smile that says, “man what the heck are you staring at me for,” I laugh as I do believe that it is the latter.

I know I have the lust of the eyes most times, right now it is purposely on as a welcomed distraction, but most times, I don’t lust (or I try very hard not to); admire is more of the word I try to display. Today I saw an exotic beauty through the hustle of my hectic, treatment plan filled day; she was a welcomed distraction. Not only were my visual receptors on fire, but my olfactory sensors were busily at work. The smile flashes and I see a slight blush, but then my eyes are distracted by the electric green-eyed beauty that makes her way past. I close my eyes and visual hallucinations begin to take over, then I pray for forgiveness and I get back to the treatment plans.

Here is the woman that I really think is beautiful:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kerry_Washington

jwriter
joe4christ.blogspot.com

I can't stop reading our text to each other.

I can't stop going to your online page.

I can't stop loving you.

BUT I HAVE TO MOVE ON!

THE HEART IS A LYING, BACKSTABBING, MANIPULATOR!!!!

Gotta stop the torture.

All I can do is cry because you told me you love me.

I was for real when I said that I wanted you and no one else.

I was for real when I said I was in love with you.

I would have attempted to give you the world if you asked me.

If I couldn't give you the world I would have done my best to make you smile.

You have the last bit of my heart, my body, and my soul.

I have nothing else to give and nothing left to share.

I sit and cry because you told me you love me and I had to let you go.

Relationship Talks- How Can You Love Me and Do the Opposite???

This is one of the most frequently talked about topics in relationship talks: “Do they really love me?” It stands to reason that if a person says they love you their actions will show it right? Wrong. We have seen time and time again that a person can tell you one thing, but do the complete opposite of what they said. Aren’t we all guilty of this pervasive talk and act?

I have to ask people if we can truly ever love someone, when we do exactly opposite of what loving someone should be. I mean can you say you love someone and cheat on them? Can you say you love someone and you lie to them right in their face? Can you love someone and physically, emotionally, or verbally abuse them? Is this love? Does loving someone come with a price?

Here is what I propose; maybe it is time for us to truly learn what love is before we go out and declare our love for someone. I also think it may be important for us to discover ourselves first; to be aware if we are truly capable of loving someone else, putting them above ourselves. Ask yourself the question; are you willing to forsake all others to love this one person? Are you willing to sacrifice everything for this person? Is loving someone that drastic? I believe in some instances it is; love is sacrifice, risky, scary, beautiful, and sometimes ugly all at the same time.

I truly believe that we have to learn the difference between love and lust. Love is not that little shock that you get in your lower regions; that can be a byproduct of love, but believe me your flesh is quite capable of getting aroused without the emotional attachment to a person. I also believe that we have to start being honest with ourselves; maybe you are not ready to settle down or to be in a relationship, maybe you do need to be single and love you a little while longer.

While we are talking just for the sake of the single brothers or the single sisters out there that are truly looking for something real; if you don’t want to be in a relationship just say that, please don’t waste my time, but maybe some of us are just so stupid we get in things we know we shouldn’t be in anyway.

Just talking about relationships!!!

jwriter

joe4christ.blogspot.com

You keep telling me you love me...prove it!!!

All I hear is your lies and your painful words; cut me up with them like daggers meant to slaughter meat.

You keep telling me that you'll always be true, but here I find you with another.

All I see is the one I love beating me down into nothing. Your love never finds me only your hate.

You say you will cherish me, but all you do is despise me.

You keep on and you'll end up with nothing; all I am to you is another love to lose.

You keep on falling in and out, in and out, in and out of love; you'll find yourself broken too.

Marriage Talks- I Want That Adam and Eve Thang

I recently discovered that I don’t want to be married! Yeah I said it I don’t want to be married, or rather I don’t want just man-made, man executed, un-ordained by God type of marriage; what I want is an Adam and Eve type of union.

I mean the marriages of today; most of them are so dysfunctional, filled with no love, no romance, and no friendship; an emotional and soul-splitting void waiting to devour the two people in them. If it is my destiny to be in a marriage, well I don’t want just that. I want to fall in love with my best friend, someone who will love me for me and all my flaws, someone who was designed to trust me with more than being faithful. This woman will be made for me, from a piece of my soul, and I can trust her with my heart, my soul, and everything that is me.

Listen I don’t want just a marriage; I want to be joined together by God. Marriage will be the icing on the cake for what God has joined together. If I’m wrong about this let me know, but I want and Adam and Eve Thang.

So…

So…it has been a minute since I wrote to you journal and boy has some things happened in my life. I experienced a near meltdown at work; being overwhelmed with the emotion/mental struggles of others, the overwhelming paperwork, and the stress of having to keep my personal life separate from my professional life. To top it all off I just experienced yet again another break up, yeah you heard me another break up. I absolutely can’t believe that I’m here again. I did expect it though, because this is my life. I excel in family relationships, friendships, professional relationships, to some extent my relationship with God, but when it comes to my relationship with a woman; well let’s just say I’m 0 and 1000.

I don’t know what to say about it journal. I think I’m an all around good guy, but maybe that just isn’t enough. Being romantic isn’t enough, communicating with women isn’t enough, being a gentlemen, being their best friend, falling madly in love with her; being faithful, being true, loving her, confiding in her, wanting to be with her no matter what; all these things are never enough. Journal, I promised myself that I wouldn’t shed anymore tears over this, but after the fiasco in the movies; not to mention today during a session I had the emotional fortitude of a two-year-old who had his toys taken from him.

Seriously I had to laugh uncontrollably to keep from crying and luckily the person said something funny and we both looked silly. I’m going to move forward though. I feel like I’m giving up journal, but I know that this is best. I’m not going to spend time moping around wondering if I will ever find love; I honestly don’t care anymore. I’m going to keep it moving and see where life will take me. God-willing I will live to see 100 years-old or more and be a healthy young man, even at that age.

So…

The God of Time and Seasons

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

1 To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
2 a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3 a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 a time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 a time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.


As I was driving home today God dropped in my spirit that there is a time and season for everything. I begin to wonder why a God who is not bound by time and who controls the seasons; has us, his children, His creations, to operate in time, space, and seasons? I contemplate this as I’m driving home and He slowly begins to reveal to me, that the problem isn’t his omnipotence, but our ignorance. It isn’t that our ignorance makes us sinful, but the sin is that we are given the keys to obtain knowledge; yet we choose to remain ignorant. He has us to operate in seasons, because we are unable to grasp the importance of following His will. He has us to operate in time, because we would never grow or learn, if we could remain unchangeable through time and space as He does. I was convinced at one point that God did not operate in seasons, but boy was I wrong.

It is imperative that you notice the very first statement in our text, To everything there is a SEASON, and a TIME to every purpose under heaven. This is an affirmation from God. He has declared that everything under heaven will be dictated by time, and governed by his season. There is no way around this; we either choose to follow God’s seasonal declaration for everything, and choose God’s purpose for time; or we choose our own way. So here I was shown that God governs our lives through time and season. Now for some of you I know you may be saying, “hey I already knew this about God, tell me something I don’t know,” well my friend, God revealed to me that the reason we’re not prospering, the reason we are not walking in His INTENTIONAL blessings, the reason we are not walking in His favor; simply because we do not want to operate in God’s time or His seasons for our lives; instead we want to make our own seasons and make Him move with our timing.

We are RMP (R-I-M-P) “Reaping- Minded- People,” we solely operate in a reaping mentality and not in a sowing capacity. The Bible says in Galatians 6:7, “Be not deceived God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap,” the Bible also says in 2 Corinthians 9:6, “But this I say, he which soweth sparingly shall reap sparingly; and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully.” What did you notice in these two scriptures? If you answered that there is not only a time/season for reaping, but also a time/season for sowing, then reader you are absolutely right. Neither scripture stated that you will just reap; why are we RMP, when there must be sowing to reap? Ok you’re still not convinced I will show you some other scriptures that speak to this principle of sowing and reaping.

Job 4: 8, “As I have seen, those who plow iniquity and sow trouble reap the same.”
1 Timothy 5:17-18, “Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who labor in preaching and teaching. For the Scripture says, “You shall not muzzle an ox when it treads out the grain,” and, “The laborer deserves his wages.”

Luke 6:38, “Give and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”

You see in each of these scriptures there was work/action/initial season/timing, and then there was action/reward/new season/cyclical timing. Yes, that is the missing link; we sit back and wonder how God can be blessing everyone else, when we have been faithful and true; we’ve been singing in the choir, paying out tithes, etc; God is saying you think you’re entitled to a blessing, but all you do is prematurely eat your harvest. All you do (Joseph) is eat your fruit before it is ripe. You do not put your hand to the plow, but you expect a plentiful harvest; all you did was sit and watch others work. I know I’m not the only one guilty of this. You can’t expect a harvest without doing some work; even in the blessings department.

Don’t believe me look: Matthew 7:7-8, “Ask and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. “ There was action with every reaction family. You have to act in God’s will, God’s timing, and God’s season. There is a time to ask and a time to be given. A season for seeking and a season for finding; if you can’t sit in PRAYER (ONE OF THE CONSTANT SEASONS) then you won’t be able to discover whether God has you in your SOWING season or your REAPING season.

Please don’t think that your reaping is simply a time for you to sit back and get your blessings; no when it was time for the season of harvest, the harvesters went out and picked up there reward. They GATHERED (VERB) their harvest. I’m not saying God won’t just have you sit still and have your harvest/blessings poured on you, but you have to be aware of what SEASON of harvest it is. Are you still not convinced of the time and season for your life? Alright let’s look at David’s example of not operating God’s season and timing:

2 Samuel 11:1- “And it came to pass, after the year was expired, at the time when kings go forth to battle, that David sent Jo’ab, and his servants with him, and all Israel; and they destroyed the Children of Ammon, and besieged Rabbah. But David tarried still at Jerusalem.” David was supposed to be in his season of battle, but he decided to move on his own timing and make his own season; we all know what happened as a result. David’s season was not to be at home resting, but to be out with his army fighting for the Lord. He instead chose to stay at home; ended up seducing another man’s wife, getting her pregnant, killing her husband, losing his child, and causing the sword to never leave his home. (Talk about reaping and sowing.)

I know I talked your head off, but what I hope you gained from this is that you begin to look at what season you are in. Ask God to help you to operate in His Will, His Time, and His Seasons. This includes our Relationships, Finances, Jobs, Unemployment, etc. If you truly begin to try and SEEK God’s will for your life, He will reveal what your season is and what you should be doing in your season. If God can change the seasons from Summer, Winter, Spring, and Fall; then He can definitely reveal to you whether you are in your season of REAPING or SOWING.

God Bless You,
jwriter