I was having a conversation about relationships with my friend and we were discussing that marriage still works. When she stated that marriage still works, I followed up with, "as long as they are willing to work at it," followed by, "and as long as they can work at it with the no matter what in mind." My friend laughed in a knowing way and stated, "yeah that no matter what part is the kicker."
We talked about the "no matter what" and I stated that I wish the no matter what wasn't so hard or difficult to handle. Then it hit me, you can't choose the intensity of your no matter what moments, you just have to make the decision to work at the relationship and stay true to your no matter what. If you feel like what has come your way was too much to handle and that you can't work at the no matter what, then reevaluating your commitment to the relationship maybe the next move.
What is your no matter what level of functioning in a relationship? Are you willing to stay in a relationship no matter what comes your way? This is a powerful question when asked to couples who have remained married for many years and are still happy. What was the no matter what moments, the moments they decided to stay even when things got tough.
Sometimes I do wish the no matter what came easy, but then what would you have to work at it for?
Work At It
Joseph is a Licensed Graduate Social Worker in the Washington, DC area. Joseph is the author of the forthcoming book “Love Me Right or Not at All”, A Quick Guide to Loving Yourself and Others the Healthy Way. This book seeks to assist everyone who reads it to love with balance and give love to the right people. Joseph is striving to become an expert in the practice of relationship empowerment. He strives to build healthy, powerful, and well-balanced relationships in the lives of everyone who seeks after the knowledge, values, and skills Joseph has honed over the last ten years. Joseph is an aspiring Marriage and Family Therapist, but to also travel around the nation and hopefully the world, to spread the message that relationships can be simple, yet amazing if you put in the work. Relationships are vital to the human experience and often shape our mindsets, our personalities, and our environments. Knowing this, Joseph works to encourage not only those who believe in his skills, but also works passionately to build his knowledge and skills in the area of relationships to present the best of who he is both personally and professionally.
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