Not Not Easily Broken Right??? Just Learn To Be Thankful!!!

A broken heart broken into pieces. Dinner only fill the wounds momentarily, leaving traces of broken evidence and lost connections. Being thankful for the times you share, being grateful of togetherness while we can bare it. Love while you can the loved ones who love you. Appreciate family and the things you share. Stop letting the small things and unforgiveness break you from loving; loving your family while they're still there.

Thanksgiving Day, yes the food, the laughter, the football games, the family; an all around exciting time. I myself used to truly be in love with the holidays and the fanfare that came with it. Two years I even did the homemade macaroni and cheese. But for the last five years the holidays have not been my favorite times of the year. It happens like a flash and I can go from my normal laughable self, into this heartbroken man who only wants to be to himself. I've learned to wear an amazingly incredible mask, that bares a smile that keeps the questions at bay, but on the inside lies hurt that goes unspoken and a desire for the days when the holidays our home was filled with family, laughter, and the smell of food that would be eaten for days. (Well the good food is still being cooked). Although healing has begun in us all in some way, shape, or form; the pain of memories are still haunting me every Thanksgiving and Christmas. I wonder how everyone else feels; as they cook alone in the kitchen, sitting at home alone with no dinner or family at all, spending time with others, out of town, or places unknown, or sitting in a room praying that this kind of sadness never is inflicted on anyone else.

Then I realize that someone has lost their mother or their father, but haven't. I realized that some one's child never got a chance to experience the holidays with their parents like I have. I realized that many people are living out on the streets and has lost all connection with their family, so although I'm sad; I still have a reason to be thankful. And every year that's the thing that God has been trying to get me to understand and the fact that I'm still alive; that I know I'm not easily broken. I believe we all have to just learn to be thankful. And I'm thankful for my family present and absent. I'm thankful for the love that I share for my family and the memories I hold so dear.

I pray that as you read this if you're spending time with your family that you're thankful. If you are with your family and maybe you have a grudge with someone your eating dinner with, let it go. Enjoy your family and every precious moment you have with them. Tomorrow is not promised to you or to your family so spend that time with them in love and not in hate. I may never fully recover from the hurt I feel or the cloud of depression that hovers over me during the holidays, but please know that I'm thankful and thankful to God for my life, family, friends, and church family. I'm going to fight hard when I start a family to instill a spirit of thanksgiving and love into them and teach them to value the time we spend together.

Remember to just learn to be thankful on this Thanksgiving Day. Happy Thanksgiving.