in the middle of a movie I broke out into tears. what grown man do you know just cries in the movies. the darkness was comfortable, the movie was good, but I was so overwhelmed with everything; tired from a stressful work week, light in the car blew out again, feeling miserable about my failed relationship once again; all this and I let loose in the middle of the movie. My friend who was sitting next to me was sleep, also exhausted from work, she didn't see the painful tears burning my face with each streak. I cried for my pain to stay within me, to comfort me in a sense. I didn't want to cry, but rather hold on to the pain to provide numbness that this wasn't real. i don't want this. i don't want to be sad all over again and yet here i am. how many times must you move on?
then after this emotional breakdown, someone has the nerve to ask me when will i ever get married. I didn't have an answer, except maybe never. relationships don't work for me; at least not the traditional ones i've tried to mimic.
i smiled as she told me i was attractive, but i've learned that maybe it might not be for me to be married.
i don't want any of this.
all i wanted was you.
I Don't Want This
Joseph is a Licensed Graduate Social Worker in the Washington, DC area. Joseph is the author of the forthcoming book “Love Me Right or Not at All”, A Quick Guide to Loving Yourself and Others the Healthy Way. This book seeks to assist everyone who reads it to love with balance and give love to the right people. Joseph is striving to become an expert in the practice of relationship empowerment. He strives to build healthy, powerful, and well-balanced relationships in the lives of everyone who seeks after the knowledge, values, and skills Joseph has honed over the last ten years. Joseph is an aspiring Marriage and Family Therapist, but to also travel around the nation and hopefully the world, to spread the message that relationships can be simple, yet amazing if you put in the work. Relationships are vital to the human experience and often shape our mindsets, our personalities, and our environments. Knowing this, Joseph works to encourage not only those who believe in his skills, but also works passionately to build his knowledge and skills in the area of relationships to present the best of who he is both personally and professionally.
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